Sunday, October 17, 2010

Endless Loop Of Stupidity 101

by The Duo

Stepping on the many to please the few. - Jesus, Book of Books

Two outsiders. Hipster haters. Who upon ascending their respective social pyramids took a step back and shuttered in disgust at the seemingly endless loop of stupidity. (refer to diagram)

They convened with the 28th Order of the Shaolin in the Nepalese mountains. There, under guidance and nourishment, the trio gathered their knowledge, wits, and sanity and thus these words of wisdom were unleashed upon the Earth. (Below Chief Monk Swami)

The duo wishes everyone who visits this blog first free themselves of their preconceived mindsets, their dull personalities, their prudence which shackles their creativity, and their sensitivity which shelters them in comfort. Open your minds and close your hearts for the Age of Enlightenment is upon us.

And now, a few words about your deserved and dedicated Gurus:

Adam De Sade: Adam was born into Nobility in the cosmopolitan branch of an old French family, the Fran├žois'. He spent summers in Monte Carlo where he developed his world renown expertise in foreskin re-growth in an attempt to help the fledgling Monte Carlan Jews assimilate. This former darling of the bestiality scene comes from money older than ancient Egypt. And yet, he still managed to amass a Rothschild-esque fortune in his rich man's black-market production of snuff films and child porn. His films included forgotten members of Eastern European royalty which appealed to the classiest clientele who were willing to pay record fees in the hundreds of millions. He served as a confidant to both the current and previous Pope.

Texas T: A pseudonym adopted because of his oily skin, little is known about this lost and found soul. Rumors abound that he was born in Detroit and raised by wolves, others state he came from an orphanage in the Canadian Rockies and was raised by wolves. While his origins are not known, how he came to be is a well documented and amazing story. One morning, when he was a teenager, he was eating a piece of cake at a local grocery and caught the eye of a modelling agent. He was asked to pose for a few photos. Next thing you know, he's naked, crying, and a few hundred dollars wealthier. Deciding that his lack of morals and a gag reflex could lead to more money he quickly rose through the ranks of male escorts famously becoming Tiger Woods' mister number 1. Before the publicity storm had reached it's climax he left the country, waiting to return.

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